After Thanksgiving it’s easy to get caught up in the rush and frenzy of Christmas. Keeping busy may be helpful, or maybe you just don’t feel the holiday spirit after the loss of a loved one. It’s Ok to not do anything somedays. Other times, you may find yourself lost in a copy of the book that resembles, “If you give a mouse a cookie” by Laura Numeroff and spend the day chasing squirrels. That is OK too. Widows get a pass on living up to the expectations we women have burdened ourselves with. It’s been six years for me now, but I enjoyed reading my post about the second year when I wanted to get back into the swing of the holiday season, but needed a little help.
Decorating for Christmas was definitely on my to do list, I just kept putting it on the bottom. The idea of digging out all my favorite memories that I had collected over the years for the Christmas tree, kept me frozen with apprehension.
My first year as a widow I avoided the Holidays and traveled. I ran away and didn’t participate in many of my favorite traditions. The cruise during Christmas week to the Caribbean with my 2 sons was perfect for the first year. I never put out any decorations and I was fine with that. A Different Christmas is OK, especially after the loss of a loved one.
The decision was made to decorate on this year 2 and I was planning to do it. I was going to do it… after I made myself some breakfast.
While I was making home fries, an omelet and coffee, I searched for a piece of paper so I could make a to do list. After brunch, my puppy started barking. I was sure he needed a walk so off we went.
When I got back from the walk I noticed that my yard needed a good clean up.
I took out the power tools – a noisy leaf blower. I started blowing leaves all over the back yard. Once the deck was cleared and the rest pushed to the sides of the yard I thought I would start decorating inside.
But then I noticed the bird feeder was empty. I have a thing about blue jays and cardinals. I feel like my husband and my dad send them to me to comfort me. It was time to get some bird food. That was really important. So I found the car keys and put on a hat. Off to do some shopping.
At the garden store, I picked up 20 pounds of bird seed, 75 feet of white pine roping and a 15 inch fake Christmas tree. I wasn’t ready to pull out all the boxes of ornaments but felt that the small tree with some pretty new decorations would spruce up the house.
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