Coping with the flu, alone…

The Flu.  It starts with a little cough.  Maybe you are not feeling up to the noise in your life.  What has happened?  Another cough.  You feel lethargic.  Not up to joining in the day.  Suddenly you feel cold.  A chill.  You need blankets. Bed.

Last week I experienced the flu.  I chose not to get the shot this year.  I just don’t like shots. Bad reason I am sure. If Mike was still here he would have told me to get the shot.  I work with small children and they cough and get sick a lot.

I was going about my normal business when this persistent cough snuck up on me.  It seemed like a bit of a cold with a cough until the chills set in. I could not get warm.  Extra heaters and blankets didn’t really help.  Layers of clothes and a hat in bed eventually sent me to sleep.

I called in sick to work and visited the local Urgent Care facility which in my neighborhood is very quick, efficient and has a pharmacy attached.  The doctor asked me when had the symptoms started and since it had been less than 48 hours I was prescribed Tamiflu to help keep the flu to a shorter time period, as well as an inhaler and nose spray to help me breathe.

I did have some trouble breathing and so the inhaler did help.   I had my Airborne tablets, my vitamin C and lots of water as prescribed.  But where was the person to take care of me when I get sick?

This is something that people who lose their spouse worry about.  What if I get sick?

When you are married, there is someone who will be there and take care of you.  That person talks to the people about what you need.  That person makes sure you get what you need and deserve.  That person loves and cares about you.

I can be cranky but who cares now?  There is no sense in that.  I need to learn to be a good patient.  But what if I don’t really feel good?  What if my flu gets worse and I get pneumonia and go to the hospital? What if I’m not careful and fall on ice walking to my car and break my leg? What if I get a stomach virus?  Who is here for me now?

So I can reminisce about all the old ailments I had and how my husband was here for me.  He was always so great whenever I got sick.  It sucks that he is not here any more to help me when I don’t feel well.

I have to give credit to my neighbors and friends who came over with soup and food once they learned I was sick.  That is what community is all about.  I posted something on Facebook, just in passing.  Well, those neighbors were so sweet and even though they didn’t want to get sick helped me get through the week.

So did my little puppy Harry.  He is a snuggler and whether I wanted to lay in bed, or on the couch, he was there keeping me company.  He even enjoyed guarding me by watching out the window for strangers.

By the 5th day, I must admit I was getting bored.  Some highlights of my sick time include straightening up my closet.  I didn’t quite have the energy to empty it out and put only the stuff I love back, but I did clear out a bag or two of unnecessary stuff.

I had time to read quite a few different blogs and follow them.  That gave me insight on where I want my blog to head, or confused the heck out of me.  I’m still not sure.

I read a book “A man called Ove” by Fredrik Backman.  It starts out a bit slow.  Ove is depressed that his wife died and is planning to kill himself but his annoying neighbors keep interrupting his plans.  I found myself laughing out loud at some parts and enjoyed this book.

I attempted to watch some TV series but I couldn’t quite get hooked on anything.  I watched a few when the boys were home from college but I wasn’t feeling it.

Finally, I looked for some movies.  Having lived with men for the past 30 years, it is unusual for me to get to pick out movies I was interested in.  They seem to take control of the remote and I just went along for the ride.

I rented the movie  “Sold” about a young girl who is trafficked from her village in the mountains of Nepal to a brothel in India and how she escapes to a rescue home.  This terrible fact that children are used for sex was appalling when I heard about how prevalent it is in Thailand.  I was happy to make a donation to Destiny Rescue last year in Mike’s name to help rescue children from the sex trade. Krabi, more islands and runaway reflections. The movie, while about a disturbing subject, was well done and I recommend it.

Another movie I watched this week was “Learning to drive“about a woman whose husband leaves her and so she decides to learn how to drive after living for all these years in New York City.  Ben Kingsley is her driver’s education teacher and it is interesting to see the comparison of their 2 lives as he is sent a wife from India and must learn how to be married at the same time as the lead actress, played by Patricia Clarkson, must learn how to live an independent life. This movie hit home with me as I am also moving into a new, unanticipated chapter of my life.

So while having the flu and being sick was no fun, I did enjoy having some alone, quiet time this week and I am taking it very slowly getting back into my normally busy life.  I do not want to get pneumonia so I think it’s time for an Airborne concoction and maybe a nap.  Have a good weekend friends.